This line from a song by Josh Groban pops into my head out of nowhere.

It brings me so much comfort.

My sweet boy is just right here…a breath away from me.

We are close. We're together.

I cling to the idea and feel its truth.

It heals me. 

It’s painful while also being positively powerful.

My heart hurts and expands in the very same moment in time. 

But love breaks through the pain...and fills me with purpose, gratitude, hope, and inexplicable joy.

How can you feel joy in the midst of deep pain and loss? 

Through beautiful memories of everyday moments like sudden magical smiles.

And heart-wrenching times when you stay up all night, weathering the storm, and waking up in the morning happy and 100% appreciating the here and now, not worried about or even remembering the struggle from the night before.

Love conquers all. It bears all. It is everlasting. 

I take a deep breath and feel love surround me. My love for Jackson. His love for me.

And God revealing himself and the depth of his love for all of humanity...for we are his children. Never to be forgotten. Never to be forsaken. 

He treasures those sudden magical smiles...just as I do. 

Wow.