Hard Things Are Inevitable
So Get Comfortable Saying "I Need Help"
Somehow I missed the fact that my daughter had turned YELLOW.
She'd been deathly pale (from what we thought was a stomach bug) for a few days so when her color started to change, I thought that was a sign of improvement.
But after a weekend trip to a clinic and no improvement, we booked a Fast Pass to see the pediatrician. I explained her symptoms (feeling absolutely crummy from head to toe, nauseous but not throwing up, extremely fatigued, and dehydrated).
The doctor said, "What I'm most concerned about is that she's yellow. I'm sending you to the emergency room."
(Never gonna live that one down. )
The trip to the emergency room turned into a 6 day hospital stay! (The ultimate diagnosis was unexplained severe hepatitis--inflammation of the liver.)
It was really scary...and I did something I don't usually do...I let people know what was going on (as it was happening instead of after the fact ) and I said those dreaded words, "I need help."
Yes, I really did!
Isolation Is Optional - Try Saying, "I Need Help"
I've been reading Jennie Allen's book Find Your People. It's making me more aware of how isolated I've allowed myself and my life to become.
(BTW it's not just me...all of western society has become increasingly isolated since the industrial revolution and significantly more so with the onset of the digital age.)
Jennie’s book is reminding me:
We weren't meant to do life alone, hiding behind our beautifully decorated closed doors.
I shouldn't try to HANDLE EVERYTHING by myself--especially medical emergencies…sleepless days and nights and the terrifying possibility of losing another child.
I NEED to find my people, be there for them, and let them be there for me.
My daughter’s hospitalization smacked me upside the head with these points.
It also got me thinking...we don't get a free pass on suffering simply because we've already suffered a lot.
We're going to face challenges, difficulties, and losses for as long as we live.
As unfair as it may seem, you will face more hard things in life.
And while I know you can do hard things...you don’t have to do them alone.
Do life with people who call to check on you, pray for you, arrange food delivery, and take shifts at the hospital when you’re down to your last ounce of strength.
If you haven't been flexing your ask-for-help muscles, please get started...right now. Because you never know when the next hard thing is going to come along.
Just because you CAN do everything all by yourself doesn’t mean you should.
If you haven't found your people yet (or you don't have the energy or interest in looking), I'm here for you.
Send me a message, practice saying "I need help"... you'll find I'm a really good listener.
Or sign up for Grief Relief Text Support - messages of hope, motivation, and encouragement.
Or follow me on Instagram.
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